Remembering Sacrifices
by JupLuna
Summary: This is a song fic on Gohan's feelings a year after the Cell Games. Sometimes we all need to talk things out.


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This is a song fic that I wrote while listening to the song "Eva" by Orgy. The story is about Gohan's feelings after the Cell Games. He is at the site of the battle talking to himself…but talking like he is talking to Goku. I apologize now for anything that I get wrong about locations or time…but it shouldn't be too off.

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You know I've started to grow since you've been away  
Lately it's scarier not knowing what's become of you  
Oh you're proud of me now, I can tell  
I'm not as fearless as you

I stand here, looking at the spot that you once stood, the last time I saw you. It's been a year now. I wonder where you are right now, Dad. I know I made you proud…I defeated Cell, but you had to die in the process. Where are you, Dad? I can still remember the first time I fought, seeing the others fall around me, protecting me because I was too scared to fight, but not you. You were always the strong one. You always fought, even if things seemed hopeless. I just wanted to be more like you. Training with you was great. I had fun, but it took someone's death to make me fearless.

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Still I pretend that you're still standing by  
To show me wrong from right  
Never got a chance to say goodbye  


Take this gift from me  
Hold it deep in mind forever  
And never let this go [ x 2 ]  


There are some nights, which I hope to Kami that you'll walk through that door alive and well. I know that you'd think I was doing the right thing, but I can never be sure. I've become what Mother wanted me to, a scholar. She still teaches me from home, but at least I'm making someone happy. 

Dad, I knew what you were going to do and I froze. I knew you were about to sacrifice yourself, but I couldn't say goodbye to you. It hurt too much, knowing that you'd be gone again. I just want you to know that I miss you and I thank you.

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I used to think you were crazy  
When you were hooked to the screen  
But now they tell me that you're in a better place  
But where did you go? (But where did you go?)  
And I swear sometimes you're watching over me  
Still I'd give the world for the chance  
Just to see your face again  


I remember the times you brought me to Master Roshi's and just played video games all night. I thought it was weird seeing my father, a grown man, acting just like a kid, but that's what I loved about you. When I talk about you with the others they just tell me that you made the right choice for your friends. I don't want to think of you like that though. I don't want to think of the fight anymore. I just want to think of you like you used to be, my Dad…my best friend. I miss you so much, Dad. I feel sometimes, your Ki. It's strange, like you're checking up on me, well us. I felt it strong the night Goten was born…were you really there? 

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Still I pretend that you're still standing by  
To show me wrong from right  
Never got a chance to say goodbye

  
Take this gift from me  
Hold it deep in mind forever  
And never let this go [ x 2 ]  


I've become like a father figure to him. I'm not taking your place, Dad. I just want him to know exactly who you are. Mom's upset that you left, but she understands. She's lightened up a bit, I guess knowing that you weren't around to actually get me off the hook with my studies. Dad, are you going to be able to come home this time? I'll never forget your smile, Dad. I promise.

****

  
(Now) Now there's nothing left but time  
Now that I'm following you  
Eva's always on my mind  
And it makes me wonder (Makes me wonder)  
What happened to you?  
You know it makes me wonder  


I still train at night, away from Mom's prying eyes. I want to be just like you. I had wanted to be like Piccolo at first, I even dressed the part, but I know that I will grow to be like you one day. I was going through the photo books with all your child hood pictures in them, and I was amazed how much of you I then saw in my own pictures. I guess the saying "The apple doesn't fall far" is true. So, Dad, what are you doing any way? Are you eating all the food in the other world? Are you bothering everyone with your antics? I…Kami, I miss you, Dad.

****

  
Still I pretend that you're still standing by  
To show me wrong from right  
Never got a chance to say goodbye

  
Take this gift from me  
Hold it deep in mind forever  
And never let this go [ x 4 ]

I guess I should head home now. I don't want to keep, Mom waiting. Bulma's been telling me everything you did as a little boy. I mean everything. Don't be mad at her for that. You were only a child when you pulled her panties off. Hehehe, I can't even imagine that. Everyone misses you, so if you can, come home soon. We all love you, Dad. Never forget that.

Gohan looks to the ground once more before flying off, back to his home in the mountains. A ghostly form materializes for only a second, and the wind sounds as if it speaks, and only the small animals around the figure hear its voice. "I'll miss you too." Then the figure with the wild black hair and orange pants, disappears into nothing, but not before an almost in audible whine of "But I'm hungry," comes from the disappearing form.

I thank those that read this, and I hope I was able to please you. I don't think Gohan was OOC, he is a very sensitive youth.

Anyway review and let me know what you think.

Ja ne minna.


End file.
